Once upon a time, way back in the recesses of my secondary school lifestyle, I carried a bit of puppy fat. As I was at the age where kids are merciless in their scorn and fury, I often got called unsavoury names and had a few jibes thrown at me. It wasn’t the nicest of times, but being such a stalwart individual I just let them bounce off me and carried on living the life that I wanted, not caring what they said.
Now imagine my surprise when, eight long years later I see one of those guys that had at one point called me out for being a bit squishy round the middle. In the gym. Looking pretty out shape. Oh how the tides have turned. The gym is the gift that keeps on giving! However, I was nice and courteous, had a brief word and continued with my workout without giving him another thought.
The rest of the idiots in there were another matter entirely. Yet more people still seem to be doing some really irritating things at the gym, and I’m here to help you make sure that you don’t do them yourself! After all, if I’ve learnt anything from my encounters this week, it’s that karma can be a real “Bee with an itch!” (this blog IS family friendly!)
I know that the songs they play over and over again in the gym can be very catchy and doubtless whatever is on your iPod is amazing and makes you feel like you can join in at any moment. Just don’t burst out into spontaneous song whilst we’re lifting weights or having a jog on the treadmill. Life isn’t an episode of Glee, try to contain yourself, please!
STOP: Poorly spotting
If you lift free weights it’s good practice to make sure you have a gym buds that will spot you and make sure that you don’t injure yourself if you drop the weight bar or just cannot lift it during your bench press sets. This keeps everyone safe and happy and the world can carry on. Unfortunately, I’ve seen some terrible spotters. These
assassins gym buddies have been looking around, checking out the cute girl on the cross trainer whilst their so called pal is struggling to keep the bar away from his throat. Use a bit of sense and pay attention guys!
STOP: Hogging equipment
If the gym is busy just remember that you’re not the only one that wants to use the machines and weights. So don’t be
a useless drain on society selfish and do your set and move on. You can always come back to the machine after letting a few people get a quick set or two in!
STOP: Carrying a bottle of powder around
This one is a major bugbear of mine. I mean seriously, if you want to see me get riled up then come into the gym carrying your regular water bottle and one of those stupid ‘shake’ bottles filled with about half an inch of powder. I understand that you think protein shakes will help you build
unhealthy, comical big muscles and it’s entirely your choice if you want to jack up on synthesised protein. Go ahead. Just don’t bring it to the gym and wave the bottle around, just so that everyone can see that you’re a big boy and you drink protein shakes. Unless you plan on drinking it during your session, it can be left in your bag and you can stop embarrassing yourself.
STOP: Spitting in the water fountain
I don’t think I need to say anything further, you disgusting creature…
STOP: Talking on the phone
For many people, the gym is place of quiet reflection and serious focus. If you start blathering loudly on your mobile, you’ve broken the peace and will receive the cold, judgemental, death harbouring looks of the rest of the gym users. If the call you relieve is THAT important, then go outside into the hallway and take it. If you’re on the gym floor, talking on your phone is both annoying and distracting. Not to mention, you stand a chance of injuring yourself as you’re not paying attention!!
Whew, that was a fair bit!
Posts for the next few as may be a bit scant as I’m not sure what time I’ll have, but hopefully I’ll get something up!