“The Customer is always right” – Or not…

Over the holidays I have a part-time job working in a well-known fast food chain. It may not be glamorous but hey it’s money! I’ve had this job since I was sixteen and since I started University they’ve let me come back every holiday and a few weekends, which is extremely nice of them. I love my job. The people who I work with are some of the nicest people you’ll ever meet and the work is reasonable and fair. The ONLY bad thing about my job is the fact that out of all the customers that we have…

2% of them should NEVER be allowed to interact with other human beings.

Honestly, sometimes it is impressive that these people can manage to get into the shop some days, what with the sheer rank ignorance that surrounds them. And it’s unfortunately this 2% of customers that make the entire process of being in work into an ordeal. As the old saying goes “The customer is always right”. Unfortunately, this isn’t always true but the 2% of customers that are destined to ruin your shift will without a doubt state this to you in a staunch belief that they are right and it is their God-given right to be correct, even when they couldn’t be further from the truth.

This belief in an incorrect statement often leads to what I have charmingly dubbed OCS – Obnoxious Customer Syndrome. Symptoms of OCS include, but are not limited to:

  • Stubbornness
  • Inability to accept fault
  • Loss of manners
  • Ignorance
  • Reversion to a primal state
  • Anger
  • Confusion
  • Wildly inappropriate behaviour/speech

Sufferers of OCS should ideally not be allowed to go anywhere near an establishment where there may be the need for them to become a customer. Ideally, these people should be isolated and have a designated “Good Customer Carer” to do their shopping for them, thus eliminating interaction between OCS sufferers and the innocent employees.

Unfortunately this is not the case and Obnoxious Customer Syndrome continues to terrorise the hard-working employees of the world. So, what are some of the worst examples of this? Personally, in my 4 years of work I have had quite a few of these customers cross my path and you do indeed remember the best of the best.

Me: Hi, how can I help you?
Customer: Can I have a cheeseburger please?
Me: So that’s one chicken burger with cheese then?
Customer: NO. A REGULAR cheeseburger!
Me: You do know that we ONLY sell chicken?
Customer: What kind of place is this?
(I calmly point to the store sign, in an effort to explain)

Sometimes they’re not quite as dense as that…

(The store has unfortunately run out of salt due to a delivery error)
Customer: Can I have some salt?
Me: I’m afraid we’ve run out of salt, there was an error with delivery.
Customer: What, you have no salt?
Me: Yes, I’m afraid that’s the case. I’m very sorry.
Customer: How the HELL do YOU run out OF SALT!?
Me: I said there was an error with delivery…
Customer: I CAN’T EAT THIS WITHOUT SALT!

And sometimes you get a “Parent Of The Year Award” nominee…

Customer: Oi mate, watch my kid while I nip out for a fag.
Me: ….(Speechless)….

So there are my stories of the joys of dealing with a few OCS sufferers. If you have a taste for this kind of thing, then head on over to Not Always Right for tons of similar stories, I’ve been laughing for a while whilst flicking through the pages.

Just remember, be one of the nice ones next time that you go to a shop/restaurant/etc. You don’t want to be featured on Not Always Right do you 😉

I’d enjoy owning one these immensely…

 

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The Sunshine Award

This morning I logged on to check WordPress and possibly start work on a new blog and I see that I have a new comment on my last post. I always get excited when people comment, it’s nice to know that people do read what I write and want to join in. This particular comment came from The Light Purple Sky and it said, amongst other things:

I’d just like to let you know that I nominated you for the sunshine award and that I really like your blog! :)

Well all I can say to that is THANK YOU! I’m glad you like the blog and I make you smile so many thanks for taking the time to read my insane waffle that I spew out occasionally.

This nomination however leaves me with a problem. What exactly IS the Sunshine Award? Well, from what I’ve discerned this morning the Sunshine Award is an award given to “bloggers who positively and creatively inspire others in the blogosphere”. It’s a kind of chain letter, where it gets passed on from blogger to blogger to let people know who inspires them. My nomination came from the aforementioned Light Purple Sky and with this award comes a list of rules which are:

  • Include the award’s logo in a post or on your blog.
  • Answer 10 questions about yourself.
  • Nominate 10-12 other fabulous bloggers.
  • Link your nominees to this post and comment on their blogs, letting them know they have been nominated.
  • Share the love and link the person who nominated you.

So without any more procrastinating:

Eat, Sleep, Procrastinate does the Sunshine Award!

I was given this award by The Light Purple Sky

Questions:
Favourite Colour?
Purple.

Favourite Animal?
Dog

Favourite Number?
7 – I was born on the 7th and it’s stuck with me ever since

Favourite Non-Alcoholic Drink?
Tea – None of this ‘Iced Tea’ malarkey either. Piping hot from the pot, milk, no sugar please 😉

Facebook or Twitter?
Twitter – If Twitter could combine the photo album aspect of Facebook, then I’d have very little reason  to use good old ‘FaceyB’.

What is your Passion?
I have a few. Tae Kwon-Do, Reading, Geography, Exercise.

Getting or Giving Presents?
Both! – Who doesn’t like getting given a present, but who doesn’t like giving someone else a present?

Favourite Pattern?
Ok, this one depends what we mean by pattern.
I rather like paisley and own a few shirts with this on them.

BUT, if we’re talking about Patterns in Tae Kwon-do, the ‘teul’ that were developed by Choi Hong-Hi in his Chang-Hon system of traditional Tae Kwon-Do, then I believe I’d have to say that ‘Hwa-Rang’ is my favourite pattern.

Favourite Day of the Week?
Tuesday.

Favourite Flower?
Tulips – They’re like less pretentious roses!

And now on to the nominations! I’ll hyperlink the name of the blog, so if you want to go and check them out (and I think you should!) then just click on through!

1. Remain Insane – She hates people and makes outstandingly truthful and funny observations about the world.

2. So it goes – Stories from the life of a 20 year old.

3. Burk Krohe: Writer – Some very accurate and funny observations about life, along with reviews and plenty of other stuff to get your teeth into.

4. The Wet Puddle – Films and stick figures. What could go wrong?

5. Brain Rants – U.S. Army rants. Always inspiring to see what he writes – currently on deployment but still posting when able. COMMITMENT!

6. Rantings of an Amateur Chef – Amazing recipes always accompanied by a story about them. I’ve had many a dinner idea from this blog!

7. JM Randolph, accidentalstepmom – Life from the point of view of an ‘Accidental Stepmom’. Currently just finished milking her 40th birthday.

8. Sonia G Medeiros – Sci-fi and fantasy writer. Always an inspirational post that makes me want to start writing again.

9. Bennis Inc – A 20-something entrepreneur, this blogger always has great content every monday. It usually inspires me to take my own life and work more seriously.

10. I’ve Become My Parents – Always able to get a chuckle out of me, if only because I can see the path that I’ve already started following myself…

A prostate exam from Wolverine…

A couple of days ago I suffered a grievous misfortune. Skip ahead to the end if you want to read about that you sadistic beggars! Needless to say it was one of the most painful everyday moments of my life and so today I thought that I would talk to you about pain.

There are many different kinds of pain, from acute pains to chronic pains, dull aches to sharp stabs. These different pains can stem from a variety of sources and can manifest from any number of different reasons. This post isn’t going to be an in-depth analysis into the genesis of pain – that’s far too serious for me! I’m going to rank the worst types of most irritating everyday pain and just generally moan about why they’re so bad.

5. Knocking your funny bone
This just isn’t funny. I have no idea who thought that it would be utterly hilarious to call this the “humerus” (I know it’s spelt differently but still, connotation are key…) because when you bang it on something it is akin to being stabbed right in the elbow with a million tiny pitchforks. In my view this is a punishment for not taking better care of your elbows. It’s like God/Fate/Life (whatever you believe, I don’t care which) is saying “Hey, you’re playing a little fast and loose with the old elbows there, maybe watch out a bit” and when you don’t watch out, he punishes you with an arm numbing achy tingling, just because you were so sure that you wouldn’t hurt the big bit of hard bone on the arm. Vindictive buggers.

4.Stubbing your toe
What is it with toes and being insanely prone to colliding with things? I don’t understand how I can know where everything is in my house and yet still when i come downstairs to go the toilet at night or when I’m carrying something and I can’t really see… BAM! Toe meets solid object in a never-ending circus of pain. Feet are ridiculously sensitive to pain if you hadn’t noticed.

3.Touching your eye with Chili
Burning, sizzling , and eventually watering. These are the stages that you’ll go through if you’ve ever touched your eyes after cutting chillies! A tiny part of you will think “this isn’t so bad.” and the rest of your smug feeling at having beaten the chilli juice will vanish into a blazing inferno of eye watering pain. A|void at all costs and make sure to wash your hands before touching your face. (As a side note, boys should [b]always[/b] do the same before going to the loo!)

2.Standing on a plug/Lego/etc
Words cannot describe the soul tearing pain that goes through your body when this happens to you. You WILL be rendered speechless for a few seconds at least, before eventually you realise what has happened and the swearing/howling/screaming (delete as applicable) WILL begin. Avoid at all costs.

And finally:

1. Using “value brand” toilet paper
There is no excuse for this behaviour. Supermarket value brands of toilet paper are one of the worst things that exist in the world and should, quite frankly, be eradicated. To use a value brand of toilet paper is akin to the burning fury of a million exploding suns receiving a prostate exam from Wolverine (hence the title). Now if you’re lucky and you’ve never had to use value brand toilet paper, and you are so very lucky if you havent, then just think of the feeling of using a supremely coarse-grained sandpaper instead of the plush softness that should occur. The pain is unbearable and I never can quite understand exactly how they can make toilet paper seem so rough. Needless to say, if you openly buy value brand toilet paper for any reason other than hitting rock bottom and having to scrape together the change found in communal washing machines to be able to afford anything then you are, in all frankness, on the road to becoming a serial killer.

Use Value brand toilet roll and it will feel like a prostate check from this guy…

Getting back to my misfortune…

I was having a pretty good day and was in such a good mood as I nipped to the loo that I didn’t bring any toilet roll down with me, assuming that there was some in there. Too late did I realise that it was the value brand and I had resigned myself to my fate. The sheer and unadulterated horror commenced and I spent the next few hours trying to avoid sitting down as my posterior felt like it had been removed with the rough side of wood file.

Never again.

Geek – Fighting The Stereotype

Geek.

Some people see this as a grave insult. Why would anyone want to be considered geeky? To like science, fantasy and all those things that are more often than not percieved as childish and silly. To enjoy learning and constantly want to know more things.

Just think, WHO in their right mind would want to be called a Geek?

The answer is…

Me.

To be called a geek is, to me, a compliment. It’s essentially saying “Hey, you’re smart and care about intelligence andspending your free time doing things that you enjoy, even if they’re not considered to be the popular choice.” Surely that’s a good thing? Surely everyone wants to increase their knowledge base so that they can have stimulating conversation and form well rounded views on topics. If not, i’m not sure I want to live on that planet…

Where does the word come from though? To Wikipedia!

This word comes from English dialect geek, geck: fool, freak; from Low German geck, from Middle Low German. The root geck still survives in Dutch and Afrikaansgek: crazy, as well as some German dialects, and in the Alsatian word Gickeleshut: geek’s hat, used in carnivals

Enlightening.

So it seems that the word geek is all over the place and has been for a while, but always with a negative connotation of being weird. This just seems unfair. The world is still seeing geeks in the way that they have been unfairly stereotyped throughout the years. That all geeks live in ther mothers basements, playing fantasy games and coding computers for fun. The idea that all geeks go LARPing ( Live Action Role Playing) or sit infront of consoles playing video games all day and are therefore either obese or physically inept. I find those ideas outdated and frankly, wrong.

Geeks are getting pushed to the forefront of the media nowadays with television shows like “Beauty and the Geek” where a smart guy and a beauty model team up to win money in a challenge and quiz show format and of course, “The Big Bang Theory” which popularises the idea that geeks are all scientists that can’t talk to women and live with thier mother or love comic books and video games. Never has there been a show that I can recall that has portrayed the ‘New Geek’ of today.

The cast of “The Big Bang Theory” are popularizing the geek stereotype

Today, there are many people, like myself, that consider themselves to be geeks. Personally, I LOVE video games, any genre, any console – I’ll play it if I get a chance. I like Sci-Fi movies and am proud of that fact and I cannot remember the last time that I was as genuinely excited about seeing a film than I was about The Avengers. (Hmmm, Perhaps the third Lord Of The Rings, come to think of it…). I like comic books and the associated Superhero films that are released into the cinema. The Lord of The Rings is still both my favourite book and film to date – I love the whole swords and sorcery stories. I love science and most nights I can be found to be learning something new online through wikipedia, news sites or CrashCourse (Which I’ve mentioned previously). I would say I am a geek. But here is the kicker. I like to socialise with my friends and I can chat to almost anyone without being socially awkward. I also hold a First Degree black belt in Tae Kwon-Do and have a gym membership, where I spend every available minute of my time, when I get a chance. I like cycling and running and took part in my very first Parkrun today (More on that later). I’m a geek but I’m active and social. I have a large group of different friends and I wouldn’t say that I adhere to the stereotype.

So watch out world. There are a new bunch of Geeks on the way and we are ready to surprise you all. 😉

Oh and yes, I DO have this GameBoy phone case on my BlackBerry…

Proud to be Geeky.